Friday’s Thoughts: The Oak and the Reeds
Strength that can’t bend
Many people are praised for standing firm, and for good reason. Holding steady through a crisis takes real strength. Over time, though, the same strength that carries someone through the hard moments can become the thing that wears them down, often showing up as anxiety, tension, or a constant sense of bracing for the next blow. Aesop’s old fable about an oak and some reeds says it well.
The fable
A Giant Oak stood near a brook in which grew some slender Reeds. When the wind blew, the great Oak stood proudly upright with its hundred arms uplifted to the sky. But the Reeds bowed low in the wind and sang a sad and mournful song.
“You have reason to complain,” said the Oak. “The slightest breeze that ruffles the surface of the water makes you bow your heads, while I, the mighty Oak, stand upright and firm before the howling tempest.”
“Do not worry about us,” replied the Reeds. “The winds do not harm us. We bow before them and so we do not break. You, in all your pride and strength, have so far resisted their blows. But the end is coming.”
As the Reeds spoke a great hurricane rushed out of the north. The Oak stood proudly and fought against the storm, while the yielding Reeds bowed low. The wind redoubled in fury, and all at once the great tree fell, torn up by the roots, and lay among the pitying Reeds.
Aesop, “The Oak and the Reeds” (public domain).
Flexibility is part of health
The fable’s lesson has a clinical counterpart. Kashdan and Rottenberg’s review in Clinical Psychology Review argues that psychological flexibility, the ability to adapt to changing demands and shift your response to fit the situation, is a fundamental aspect of health. Rigid responses, such as avoiding feelings or pushing harder every time, are linked in that literature to poorer wellbeing.
Bending is not giving up. The Reeds keep their roots in the ground. They simply move with the wind instead of against it.
One thing to try this week
Pick one place where you have been pushing against the wind, such as a schedule you keep forcing, a feeling like anxiety you keep holding down, or a standard that no longer fits. Ask what it would look like to bow a little, just enough to stay rooted.
If the storm has been going on a long time, there is no need to weather it alone. Eastside Center for Healing welcomes new inquiries. Use the contact form on the homepage to get started.
Sources
- Kashdan, T. B., & Rottenberg, J. (2010). Psychological flexibility as a fundamental aspect of health. Clinical Psychology Review.
- Aesop, “The Oak and the Reeds” (public domain).